Leanne's Last Post: Machu Piccu

Hello family, friends, and followers,

The title of this last post may be a bit misleading so I apologize.  I've been stuck on this post for a long time.  Leanne picked out the pictures for this last post so I just didn't know what to do with it.  After nearly eight months I've decided to not write it but just leave the pictures.  It hurts too much to dive into what Leanne was thinking when she picked these photos.  Obviously I remember being there and know what she was thinking but it's too difficult right now to do it.

Everybody knows the terrible events that happened nearly six months ago and I'm sad to say that I can't shed any light on it in this post because Leanne was as happy as could be during this section of our trip.  I had no indication of what was going to happen on the worst day of my life, January 17th, 2014.  It will forever be a day that a huge piece of my soul died.  I am two different people now.  The person that was before that day and the person that I am now.  A strange transformation happens when you lose the love of your life to death.  You care about nothing and your "Give a shit" level drops to next to nothing.  There's not a thing in this world that can affect me and I don't care what people say about the whole ordeal or what I do now.

When Leanne picked these pictures she was happy just like she always was.  Leanne was not a depressed person, Leanne had depression.  The difference in the two is as far apart as the people that can't recognize this.  They might as well live on different planets.  During the whirlwind of memorial services that Leanne had one group said that they don't want to remember Leanne as a depressed person.  LEANNE WAS NOT A DEPRESSED PERSON, SHE HAD DEPRESSION.  I remember the anger that this made me feel but I sucked it up.  The danger in this type of thinking is that we learn nothing.  The stigma of depression rolls on and nobody notices.  This is the exact thinking that feeds the stigma and changes nothing.  This type of poisonous thought is something that we all must change.

Thanks for listening to my rant.  I could have gone on and on but I want to get to the photos:


Thanks for following.


Leanne and Josh